How To Sleep When Your Mind Has Other Ideas

I had always been a great sleeper ever since I was a kid. I was one of the lucky ones who would fall asleep within seconds of my head hitting the pillow. Occasionally, I would awake in the middle of the night, but I would always fall right back asleep.

I would wake up early at the same time daily, sleep in from time to time, and I generally felt good about my sleep habits.

Recently, that all changed. I’ve had so much trouble falling asleep. Some nights I don’t pass out until midnight despite getting in bed before 10pm. The best part is, I always wake up like clockwork at 5am, regardless of how many hours of sleep I get.

I also have a chronic inability to nap. I’ve never fallen asleep during the middle of the day successfully. So, for me, it’s sleep well at night or don’t get good sleep for 24 hours.

I started trying all of the standard sleep rituals. I made the room extra dark by blocking out all light with shutters, I turned down the thermostat and turned on my fan to make it cool, I stopped eating so close to bedtime to allow my body to fully digest, I took a long hot shower before I got in bed, listened to relaxing music, had no caffeine past 3pm, and tried to limit screen time in the evening.

I also tried drinking warm, comforting drinks before bed (this only made me have to get up and use the restroom in the middle of the night) and sleeping in different types of pajamas.

Yes, I did it all with high hopes for deep sleep…

Well, none of it worked. Nothing gave me that good deep sleep of my younger years…

The good news is, that I did find a few key things to help me sleep better at night and ironically, none of them take place right before I go to bed…

Be More Active

On the days I sit in front of my computer for hours, I have the worst time sleeping through the night. It’s as if my body has not expelled enough energy and so it tells my brain it does not need or deserve sleep.

I’ve found that even going for a 20 minute walk each day increases the chances that I’ll fall asleep quickly at night. A 20- minute walk plus a 30-minute workout is even better!

Even when all I’ve done is run errands all day, I am sleepier when it gets to bedtime then if I’ve just been sedentary. You don’t have to do anything crazy.

When I’m working from home and get a phone call I’ll pace around my yard as I’m talking. It’s such a small thing, but it keeps me moving, and keeps me using energy. I also have a mini-trampoline in my office for “bouncing breaks” and a TRX Suspension Trainer hanging in my garage for stretch and active breaks intermittently throughout my work day.

Staying just relatively active makes a world of difference. Staying moderately active most of your day is Optimal.

Hydrate

I always know I haven’t hydrated enough during the day when I’m parched at night. When that happens, I end up chugging water before my head hits the pillow and then I’m bound to wake up at 3am to use the restroom.

If instead you stay properly hydrated throughout the day, you’re less likely to experience a break in your sleep.

I’ve heard some say just not to drink for a few hours before bed. I don’t think this is sound advice. If you’re thirsty, you need to drink. But, if you drink more water throughout the day, you’ll by default be less thirsty at night.

Keep a water bottle next to you at all times, easily accessible, and full to the brim. I recently bought a new brightly colored Hydro Flask water bottle that simply makes me smile whenever I see it and it inspires me to hydrate. Get yourself a water bottle that speaks to you and that you love! Invest in yourself. It works.

Similarly, don’t be afraid to eat before you go to bed. I have found that eating my full dinner earlier on helps my body digest before sleep, which personally helps me sleep better. But, if you’re hungry before bed… EAT. The worst thing is to wake up at 3am starving, thirsty, or in need of the bathroom. Take care of your basic human needs.

Stay Busy

Staying busy is just as important as staying active. By this I mean you need to keep your mind busy. If you do nothing all day, you’re less likely to be mentally tired at the end of the day, and as a result your mind starts to wander when your head hits the pillow.

Instead, if you keep your brain occupied, it will also be ready to rest when it’s time for you to go to sleep. Try reading thought-provoking books and writing in your journal daily.

This doesn’t mean you can’t ever have a lazy day. But I’ve found on days I get less done, I’m less likely to sleep well at night.

This probably is also due to underlying stress. Even if you’re not consciously stressed about something you didn’t get done, those tasks could be weighing you down when you try to go to sleep.

So, try to cross those priority items off of your to do list each day, and help your mind relax in the evening.

Stop Trying so hard

For me, the buildup of a nighttime routine makes me think of nothing but how much I hope I’ll fall asleep that night. That’s dangerous and is a form of anxiety.

The more active our mind is, the less likely we are to sleep. You know when you lie there calculating how many more hours you have left to sleep? The longer you can’t sleep the more that number comes down and the more stressed you become.

I know some people who can function on no sleep at all. But I’m certainly not one of them. And that is just not Optimal YOU protocol for Optimum well-being!

So, I stopped trying. I stopped focusing on my nighttime routine. I just focused on staying active, staying hydrated, and staying busy throughout the day. I always remind myself that my body was designed to move. Make a point of moving more than sitting each and every day.

Most of the time, the nights that I couldn’t sleep were the result of me not being active enough in the daytime. By giving myself one more activity a day, like Pilates or a hike outdoors, I was able to tire myself out enough to catch some Zzzs.

The Takeaway

To have better sleep I’ve learned you can’t just rely on your nighttime routine. You have to change the routine of your entire day.

The more I focused on my nighttime routine, the more stressed I became about sleep because all of my attention was on the act of sleeping. By diverting my attention elsewhere throughout the day, by staying active and staying busy, I made my body both more prepared for sleep, and less mentally focused on it.

Staying hydrated during the day helped me wake up less and not trying so hard to go to sleep when it clearly wasn’t happening, helped me fall back asleep quicker when it was time to crawl back into bed.

These strategies aren’t a perfect recipe. My sleep routine isn’t prefect every night. But realizing that sleep is impacted by every facet of our day helps me to plan ahead for more activity throughout the day. And, by realizing that focusing just on the evening hinders our own capacity for rest, my sleep is now much improved. Your sleep can improve too with a few lifestyle adjustments and your own personal sleep strategy. Keep after it until you find your own personal sleep success! Here’s to catching more Zzzs!