How to Fall in Love with Boredom and Be Mentally Strong
Growing up, I knew at an early age that I was “TYPE- A” perfectionist. I always worked hard for good grades and the chance to make the team at the top. It didn’t come easy and I didn’t always get an A or make the team. Whether we are talking about athletes, artists, or academics, the story is the same. If you want to fulfill your potential, then you must practice a specific skill for a long time with remarkable consistency. Mastery is never an accident. Mastery is rarely easy.
Paul Erdos, the fantastic mathematician, published endless papers before establishing himself as a thought leader.
Famous composers and artists put in decades before ever earning their recognition.
Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson played in the Canadian Football League, suffered injuries and struggled for years before he developed incredible strength and acquired fame.
Somehow, top performers in any craft figure out a way to fall in love with boredom, get in the reps, and really do the work. It’s a trick somedays, but so worth every effort.
Of course, whenever “experts” share stories about successful people they often leave out a key ingredient of the story. How, exactly, do successful people fall in love with boredom that can come through repetition? Perhaps more important, how can you fall in love with boredom when you’re trying to build a habit that you know you should do, but you don’t really want to do? You know, like cardio 5 times a week, eating a plant-based breakfast, or getting in a 10-minute meditation daily?
Let me share two strategies that work for me:
How to Fall in Love with Boredom
First, there is very little hope for falling in love with a habit that you truly hate. I don’t know anyone who legitimately dislikes an activity and somehow falls in love with doing it. It doesn’t add up. It’s very difficult to hate something and be in love with it at the same time. Catch my drift?
Let’s say you hate working out, but you know it’s good for you and exactly what you need. If you want to fall in love with the boredom of going to the gym and doing the reps over and over, then you have two options:
1. Increase your proficiency at the task.
Even tasks that you are good at will feel monotonous some days, so imagine the uphill battle you’re fighting if you are constantly trying to do something that you don’t feel skilled at. The solution? Learn the basic fundamentals of your task well and celebrate the small wins and improvements you make along the way. With our workout example, let’s say you want to learn how to do a proper squat or bench press. Practicing these new skills in the gym can be fun and making tiny improvements each week builds momentum. Try doing it with a fit friend and now you can rally for one anothers’ success. It’s much easier to fall in love with doing something over and over again if you can look forward to making progress. And it’s even more sweet when we can share it with another.
2. Fall in love with a result of the task rather than the task itself.
Let’s be real: there are some things that we should do that are always going to be a hassle. Doing your cardio might be an example. Very few people look forward to setting their lungs on fire, getting their heart pounding and sweating profusely!
I find that I have more success in situations like these when I shift my focus away from the actual task and toward a result. Sometimes this is a direct result of the habit I’m trying to perform. Other times, it’s a result that I invent. For example, you can make a game out of not missing workouts even if you don’t enjoy the workout itself. Let’s say you have done two treadmill sprint workouts in a row. Your goal is to fall in love with becoming the type of person who doesn’t miss workouts. You’re not worried about how you perform. You’re not worried about if you’re getting faster. You’re not worried about getting six-pack abs or any other type of result. For the most part, you’re not even thinking about the workout. Instead, you’re simply focused on keeping your workout streak alive. That’s right….just keeping it ALIVE!
This is basically a strategic exercise gameplan. Your only goal is to “not break the chain.” By shifting your focus away from the activity you dislike, you’re giving yourself an opportunity to fall in love with the boredom of sticking to the streak, which is something you do enjoy and can look forward to because you love that feeling of accomplishment.
The Power of Patience
I was talking to a friend in the gym recently. She had decided that she wanted to change her strength training routine despite making good progress with her old program. I asked her why. She made a few excuses before eventually saying, “Basically, I AM BORED.” And now she sees the wisdom in a personal trainer to help change things up and have that fit buddy to bust through boredom.
I used to be there myself, but I’m starting to believe that a beautiful blend of patience and consistency is the ultimate competitive advantage. Success is often found by practicing the fundamentals that everyone knows they should be doing, but they find too boring or basic to practice routinely. Isn’t that life? And most importantly, I learned I don’t have to struggle alone.
It’s like studying hours for all your classes. There’s nothing sexy about it, but it works come test time. You don’t need to reinvent the fundamentals. You need to commit to them. Do more of what really works. Learn to do more of what brings you success by falling in LOVE with the sometimes boredom that comes with it. Try that on.
Here are 3 strategies to get you there:
Practice being bored. Instead of checking your phone every time you have a few minutes, try observing your surroundings, focusing on your breathing, or chatting with one of the people around you…
Meditate and just be in the moment.
Define your values and goals. Try writing it down in your journal and review it often to rework, refine and strategize for success.
Optimal YOU navigates through moments of boredom to reach her full potential and purpose with clarity and confidence!
